Banking on Digital Growth
Banking on Digital Growth

Episode · 1 year ago

26) #ExponentialInsights: Adapting to Hard, Fast Change w/ Dr. Benjamin Hardy

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

You can't predict the future.

But as Warren Buffett said, "Twenty years from now, everything's gonna be better than it has ever been."

In times like these, how do we adapt to hard, fast change in a way that creates a positive future for ourselves and our families?

On this episode of the Banking on Digital podcast, Dr. Benjamin Hardy, father of five and author of Personality Isn't Permanent, talked about how to adapt to hard, fast change.

We discuss:

-Why you need a future that gives your life purpose

-The reason personality tests are a terrible way to hire

-The process of imagination and decision making

You can find this interview, and many more, by subscribing to Banking on Digital Growth on Apple Podcasts, on Spotify, or here.

The shorter the list of more simple, and the more simple, the higher the motivation and the higher the likelihoodthat you'll do it. You are listening to banking on digital growth with JamesRobert Lay, a podcast that empowers financial brand, marketing, sales and leadershipteams to maximize their digital growth potential by generating ten times more loans and deposits. Today's episode is part of the exponential insight series, where James Robert Interviewsthe industry's top marketing, sales and FINTECH leaders, sharing practical wisdom to exponentiallyelevate you and your team. Let's get into the show. Greetings and hello, and welcome to the twenty six episode of the banking on Digital Growth Podcast, where I James Robert Lay, your digital anthropologists, continue to commit tosimplify the biggest digital marketing and sells strategies that will empower you and your financialbrand to generate ten times more loans and deposits in this post covid world aswe work together. Today's episode is part of the exponential insight series and I'mexcited to welcome Dr Benjamin Hardy to the show because of the work that he'sdoing as an organizational psychologist and the inch sites that he has shared in hisnew book personality isn't permanent. Dr Hardy is an organizational psychologist and the bestselling author of will power doesn't work. His blogs have been read by overa hundred million people and are featured on Forbes, fortune, CNBC, Cheddarbig think, among many others. Dr Hardy as a regular contributor to inkand psychology today, and from two thousand and fifteen to two thousand and eighteen, he was the number one writer in the entire world on mediumcom. Heand his wife, Lauren live in Orlando and have adopted three children through thefoster system in February two thousand and eighteen, and then just one month later,Lauren became pregnant with twins who were born in December of two thousand andeighteen. Hello, been good to have you on the show today. Greatcommuty James. You know, I thought my wife and I had it toughwhen we welcomed our four kids to our family, but and that was infive years now. You you you had a bit faster pace of adding fivekids. Yeah, I think you said it was, and we were talkingjust now twelve months yeah, when we did have the older three as fosterkids for a few years and we fought the legal system with no clear expectation, only a lot of faith in hope that we would eventually adopt him.But then, you know, with the adoption, just happened. Suddenly,just boom, some of the laws and of Carolina changed. We're able toget the kids and then a month later, sound out, weird you know,we're pregnant with twins. So yeah,...

...two thousand and eighteen we adopted threeand had twins. It was a is a big gear and we're we'rebig on adapting to hard fast change. We'll talk about that, adapting tohard fast change, because you know, that's something that we're all having todo right now in this post covid world. Is We're trying to pick through it. But first one of the things that I'm just curious about is whatis good for you right now in this kind of this new normal we're tryingto work through together anotherwise chaotic time of crisis. I'm always one who's justtrying to find something at least hopeful to begin a conversation with. What's goodfor you? What are you excited about? Excited about a lot of things.I mean obviously have five kids. You know, when you really breakdown everything going on, like yeah, there's going to be a lot ofinteresting stuff that's non predictable. But as far as myself, like, I'vespent a lot of great time with my kids and I are my schedule honestlydidn't change that much. I think the one thing that did change I probablydidn't travel four or five times that I would have traveled just because I can't. Those events and things like that were dropped. But for me, I'vespent a lot of time just folks, on my bigger goals, my spiritualgoals, and then my family, you know, as far as my careergoals and so like, everything's great for me. I mean I'm a bigbeliever. I mean I recently listened even to Warren Buffett, you know,and warn Buffett simply said can't predict the future in any specific time frame,but I can tell you in twenty years from now everything is could be betterthan it is ever been. And so I kind of like that just longterm future perspective and I think that, you know, I actually recently readman search for meaning. Yeah, have you read that one. Yeah,have you had been answers for me, Victor Frankel? Yeah, yeah,I've picked through it. You got to read it, you got to reallyread it, like it's so timely for right now. But one of thebig things you obviously the books about the Holocaust and like all the Jews andthe German concentration camps. And one of the things that froncle found was isthat, like, unless you had a future that gave your life purpose,your present was meaningless, and so, like the People's suffering had no purpose, and so they would die, yeah, the moment they lost a purpose,and so, like it's essential to enjoy the present, even no matterhow difficult it is. You have to have a future. It's like it'sessential for human psychology. So, like, I think that that's really what's gettingme through. It is me and my wife have a huge future thatgoes way beyond covid nineteen. was was Frankel his his his present, likesomething that he was focusing on. It was wasn't a tree outside of hiscell, if I recall correct well, I mean he was, he wasreally focused on his future, like he was he had a his present head, meaning. I mean he was he was just doing things like other,you know, other Jews that were in the concentration camps. He would dohard labor or like just he was doing all sorts of menial tasks that theywere forced to do. But he found a way to cut his suffering hadmeaning because he had a future. What's driving for? And so, likehe was able to turn his suffering into spiritual development or personal development, becausehe saw himself in the future teaching lectures and he saw himself writing books like. So he had a future that gave...

...him a purpose, which gave hislife meaning, and I think that, you know, he talks about howa lot of the Jews at the time, like they would all look, theyall had something to hope for. Like they would hope for like gettingout on Christmas, just as one example, and Christmas would come and go andthey wouldn't get out. They'd all start dying because, like, theirfuture disappeared. Yeah, I think the you know, in times like these, it's essential to keep your eye on the future, because then it givesall of this meaning. And so for me, like me and my wife, like we've got a huge vision spiritually, but also I have huge vision formy work, and so it's like, you know, it allows you todeal with this in a different way. You know, I like the DanSould and quote. The bigger the future, the better the present.So it's just like you can handle things if you've got a meaning in apurpose to do so. If you don't have a meaning and purpose to doso, you can't handle very much. Yeah, and I'm seeing a lotof that. That thinking around it took to come back to Dan Suli andalways make your future bigger than your past. I'm seeing a lot of that rightnow with what we're experiencing in financial services, being forced into a digitalfirst like business model. We're up to this point. A lot of thisis still been rooted in legacy, built around branches, the physical world,broadcast, and it's very hard for some to make that shift transitionally just intheir mind, yet alone to make it an actual reality. I've been followingyour work now for a while. You and I were talking before we hitrecord, but will power doesn't work. It was a gift from from thenand strategic coach, and normally on a flight back from Toronto I'm going tobe probably watching something just because I've been doing deep thinking for the course ofa day and I don't watch TV or anything, but like that's the onlykind of quote unquote, time that I give myself to do something like that. But I remember getting on that plane and opening up that book and justdiving into it, highlighting it and like wow, this is this is someinteresting stuff. And then now you have a new book that's out. Personalityisn't permanent. That I know will just it'll extend upon what I think whatthe world needs right now. Because as you opened up that book, youshared a story how a personality test almost it had a big negative impact,had the potential to have a negative impact on your future, but you didn'tlet it. But I want to start the conversation there. Can You unpackthat story of that personality test and and the negative ramifications it could have hadon a very important relationship? Yeah, it's kind of funny. I didn'teven know that that story was going to go in the book, to behonest with you. Like that story got like bolted in near the last minutebecause we were trying to find like the right hook or the right story tobegin it and I didn't think about that. Someone was like the books not reallyabout personality test so much, but this there is obviously a big aspectof that in the book. But anyways, back when I was in college Iwas dating Lauren, the person who ended up becoming my wife. Buta big popular personality test of the time...

...was called the color code. Obviouslythere's Myers Briggs, any a gram disc all these big tests, but colorcode was a similar format. Basically breaks people up into four groups and wetook the test because Lauren really liked it. Her family took the test seriously.They saw people through the perspective of the test and when they found outthat I was a white according to the color code, they were really concernedabout Lauren dating me and getting married to me. The reason is is thatwhites, according to the color code, are very like passive Aloof noncommitted,like very much in their head and, you know, dreamers, but notgoal setters, like not not effective people, maybe, you know, on thebroad spectrum. And Lauren had previously been in a very abusive marriage,like for three years. She was in a rough marriage, and Lauren andher whole family kind of saw themselves as red's according to test, and redsare like type a focused, go, go go, and Lauren had beenin America an abuse of marriage with a guy who's also a red according tothe Color Code, and obviously the guy was so dominating, so abusive,so destructive that it kind of turned lauren into a shell of herself. Andso when she left a marriage, she went and traveled for a year,served a church mission. She was she spent a several, like two orthree years, kind of like re establishing herself as a human being after that, and I was the first person she dated and when her parents found outthat I was a white they were like, okay, I know what Lauren's upto, like she doesn't want to be in a situation where she canbe so dominating, and so she's dating this white who is a passive aloofcharacter who she can then control and dominate the situation. And they were letting. They're kind of a patriarchal family and so they're like, I mean,they're really open on an equal grounds, but they were very much like yougot to marry a real guy, like just because you're afraid of what happenedin the past, you don't want to be dominated, you can't just getinto a relationship that you feel is safe with this white like. You needa real man. You still need someone who's serious, like who can helplead and guide a situation. And so they were all like, you shouldprobably not marry this guy, even if he's a good dude, like youneed to find probably someone who's a real man. Wow, yeah, Ithought it was pretty pretty interesting, to be honest with you, from thatperspective. Well, you know, I'm I can relate to that because mywife, my wife and I, we knew each other in high school.We were friends. Actually had a crush on her next or neighbor, nice, and we had a freshman English class first day of high school, MissBungoes, and so her next neighbor actually introduced us. And then fast forwardfor years later. We're in freshman in college and WHO's in my freshman Englishclass again? It's Delina, and like I fell fast for her and I'mlike, I told her at eighteen I'm going to marry you. She goes, you're crazy. I said now I'm going to marry you. Just Watchand let me say and that let's really awesome. Well, so she's left. She's Lebanese, and it was like...

...you to talk about patriarchal families.It was one of the situations that her dad, you know, did it. You're either married or you were engaged. It's so like we had about guys, about a six and a half year formal courtship, holy cow.And like her sister would come and hang out with us that like fre'd goto the movies or something. And now if it was like during the day, you know, mom's at home, go grab a bite for lunch andit's cool. But the first time that I asked for her hand in marriage, her dad told me no. So hearing hearing that story from you likeand having that Kype type of a conflict, I'm like, man, it's goodto know that, like, because the struggles worth it. There's beautyin the struggle. And he said you're too young, you need to tofocus on your schools, because I was still on my Undergrad but then Iwas going to go do my Mba and my business was was just getting startedand I said, okay, I'm going to come and talk to you insix months. And six months later he comes back. I come back toMiss Mr Dawn said I'd like to marry your daughter. He Says No.The second time and I remember I slam my hand on the table. Ilooked him, strainingly asked, Mr Dow I respect you, I respect yourfamily, please respect me. I respect your daughter. Please respect what wewant. And he set back, he wiped his hands. He said,okay, you can medry my daughter. So it was one of those thingsthat it's like hearing that you had to prove yourself kind of yeah, yeah, and and and now with my kids I think I'm going to do thesame exact thing. You mentioned that the book is not about personality test andI think that's very clear and it's important to make that distinction. But younote that test like disc Myers Briggs. They're unscientific and there they might evenbe harmful, which I didn't know that this was a two billion dollar industry. So unpacked out a little bit for me. How might test like discMyers Briggs be harmful to someone? I mean, you got a great story, but can you got a little bit deeper into that? Yeah, definitely. I will say my story is a great example of someone who was viewedin very limiting terms. The same type of thinking that goes into these categoricalstyle personality tests which by the way is not how psychologists few people and it'sa very terrible way to hire. As an example, like if you're hiringthe Myers breaks of the disc can't predict formants. You could have five peoplethat are d's and they could all be completely different. You know, likethe there are terrible performance scale, but also they're just not how people actuallywork. But how many people, how many people make hires today base uponthat? I think of so many HR departments or like rooted in this typeof thinking. Yeah, they're the lowest, absolute lowest grade of measurement tool therewould they would definitely not be considered good science from like a psychological perspective. And I I had to learn that over and over and over becoming anorganizational psychologist, someone who's literally professionally trained...

...in methods of hiring, culture,leadership, etc. Like they were like don't hire based on those tests.and honestly, this test or not valid or nor reliable. Stay scales.But what that type of thinking? The whole black and white like your you'rea red, you're a blue, you're a yellow. That type of thinkingis literally the same kind of thinking that goes into, honestly, racism andthings like that, like you put people into a category and you assume thateveryone from that in group has certain characteristics ever and out. But, asidefrom not being psycho in an aside from not being good science, they leadoutsiders to view a person in very limiting, simplistic ways and they lead you asa person to view yourself in very limiting ways. So, like,I'm more interested in what the test does for me as a human being.If I take a test and I take the test seriously, what does thatdo to my mindset? What does that do to my identity? There's alot of research out of Harvard from Ellen Langer. She's been studying mindfulness forfor several decades. She wrote a book called Mindfulness in a book called counterclockwisebeally. Need to read those books. But when you have a label thatyou've taken seriously, you become ignorant of every aspect you know, you becomemindless to when the labels not true. In psychology we have selective attention.We can only focus on so many things at once, like I. Youknow, there's even research like if you come from a different country, you'regoing to notice things perceptually that you wouldn't notice if you're in a you knowyou did. We see the world to a lens and when you have alabel you see your you see the world through that Lens. Labels Create TunnelVision. And so what what Allen Langer has found is that like, forexample, if someone believes they're depressed, they believe they're always depressed, eventhough there's many times throughout a day when they're not. And so when someonebelieves they're an introvert, as an example, they'll think that they're always an introvertwhen in many occasions they would actually reflect someone who is really great withpeople. They just only focus on that because they've defined the label so much. And when you define a label and it becomes an aspect of your identity, you then seek to defend the label, you seek to confirm it, youdo anything and everything you can to confirm it in your identity narrative,which is a basically the way you explain yourself is in very definitive terms.And there's a lot of research at this point out of Harvard, and Iwould point people to Daniel Gilbert's work. You gave a great Ted talk calledthe psychology of your future self. But basically this is kind of a cognitivebias that people have, basically the ideas that we overvalue our present perspectives.We actually think that who we are today is who we always will be.Truth is, you're not the same person you were five or ten years ago. In the future you're not going to be the same person you are today. And if you if you begin a process of thinking about who you wantto be in the future and using that as the basis of your identity,then what you want to do is ultimately want to stop holding so tight toyour current self. But these tests, these tests lead you to a veryfixed mindset about yourself, and so I think that these come with a lotmore problems than benefits and it's ultimately not that useful to be so definitive andhow you explain yourself. So fix mindset, labels, tunnel vision. I thinkit's like I see where this can...

...hold people back. Like assume thatI'm a financial brand leader working in the banking space. I've built my entirecareer for the last twenty years on a model built around the physical world ofbranches, brick and mortar, something I can see, I can touch,I can feel, but the challenge that I'm having is that future that Iknow I need to create. Like philosophically, I'm struggling because I can't bridge thatgap in my mind. Technology has transformed our world and digital has changedthe way consumer shop for and buy financial services forever. Now consumers make purchasedecisions long before they walk into a branch, if they walk into a branch atall. But your financial brand still wants to grow loans and deposits.We get it. Digital growth can feel confusing, frustrating and overwhelming for anyfinancial brand marketing and sales leader. But it doesn't have to, because JamesRobert wrote the book that guides you every step of the way along your digitalgrowth journey. Visit www dot digital growthcom to get a preview of his bestselling book banking on digital growth, or order a copy right now for youand your team from Amazon. Inside you'll find a strategic marketing manifesto that waswritten to transform financial brands, and it is packed full of practical and proveninsights you can start using today to confidently generate ten times more loans and deposits. Now back to the show. How does personality play into some of that? That struggle you mentioned, like I'm viewing myself this way, but whatare the the ways that I might be able to help break free from thepast that's kind of informing my presence so that I can be free to createsomething bigger, better and brighter? HMM, yeah, I think that the goalis actually that the past isn't such an extreme predictor of the future,unless you're really really happy about your past. But you mean even then, we'vealready talked about you know before this meeting. It's sometimes just because thepast is succes Dessel, doesn't mean that's what you should hold on to.You know, as one example, like I was a top writer. Iwas the top writer on me andcom for years, and that could become astatus or an identity that I overattached to, which then can like limit what needsto happen in the future. It's a whole idea. What got youhere won't get you there right. But obviously your questions more to the ideaof maybe you know issues in the past or just or just patterns that areso easy to fall into. Right from my perspective, identity is much moreimportant of a concept than personality. Identity is how you define yourself and yourselfconcept is usually the thing that predicts your behavior, and your behavior over timeis what ultimately shapes your personality. It's important for people to realize like personalityis and not innate, inflexible trait.

Personality is contextual. You show updifferently and basically in different personas and different roles and different environments. But alsoyour personality does in fact change over your lifetime, whether you do anything aboutit. Like there's a lot of what's called Longitudinal Research on the subject,where it's like, your personality is not going to be the same when yourfourteen is w hundred and fifty, like you're going to be a different person, you're going to have gone through many things, and so, rather thanworrying so much about personality, especially your current personality, there's a lot ofresearch now on the idea of your future self, like the person you ultimatelywant to be in the future, and to me this is a really importantand interesting realm of research. There's a lot of you know, there's beena lot of study on the idea that the number one deathbed regret that peoplehave is that they didn't have the courage to be the person they wanted tobe. Instead, they lived up to the expectations are the norms of thosearound them, whatever persona or environment they had already created, you know.And basically, when you're just being who you've been yesterday, you're living onautopilot, you're being subconscious, you're just kind of being reactive to environment.And we all want to make changes in our lives. We all want tomake improvements, whether it's ourselves as a leader, whether it's our business,whether it's our finances, whether it's our family, whether it's our health,we all want to make improvements. What Daniel Gilbert found at Harvard is thereason people don't make such improvements is because they spend way more time thinking abouttheir past then imagining and creating a new future. And one of the otherproblems is the people think that who they are today is who they ultimately alwayswill be. That's not only not true, but it stops you from actually thinkingabout the person you want to become. And that's actually way more important,and that's a process of imagination and decisionmaking that we can all start into. So taking time to write to journal, to just put pinned the paper onwho I want to become who I want my organization to become. There'sa lot of value that can be created from that type of an activity.Of It is. Is that what I'm hearing from you? Let's just firststep is taking the time to actually think about it. It's important to realizethat your future self, your future self, is a decision you make. It'snot a discovery that you make. It's a decision. Who Do wewant to be, or who do I want to be? That's the firststep. I think that, like think about it from an addiction standpoint,you know that someone's right over in acome addiction when they start becoming public aboutit, like they start telling people, look, I've got a problem rightII want to make a change now. I'm ready to stop defending my mypresent. I'm ready to stop justifying my present by blaming the past. I'mwilling to admit that where I'm at right now is not where I want togo and I'm ready to move forward in my life. So, like,once you've actually started to define your future self, and you I'm not speakinglike everyone's in a dat an addict. That's notice I'm saying. The firstthis first step is actually defining who you want to be. I think actuallyusing like a oneto three year timeline is really great. Two to three yearsis really great, like where do I want to be in two to threeyears from now in my situation, maybe in my finances and my relationships andmy environment, and just to finding who you want to be. The nextstep is, honestly, from the perspective of an addict, telling people aboutit, owning the fact that this is...

...where you want to go, ratherthan pretending that you're completely justified and who you are today. It's saying thisis where I want to go, this is it's like letting the cat outof the back, you know, but that that telling people about who youwant to be in the future then leads you to becoming a lot more accountable, to becoming that person. At leads you to having a desire to beconsistent with that new story. It clarifies your environment. There's a lot ofI mean there's many steps even beyond telling people about it, but that's acourageous step that people need to take. You know, it's interesting you usethe words taking the time to stop and think, like, if you're notdoing that every day, then your feature is not that important to you.I I think about the financial brand teams, the marketing teams, of self teams, leadership teams that I'm working with, and we do that like every ninetydays and it's built into even art, what I call the digital growth operatingenvironments. There's four of them. There's the the learning aspect, there'sthe thinking aspect, there's the doing aspect and then there's the reviewing and thereflection aspect, whhich then transitions back into more learning, more thinking, evenbetter doing, and it just builds. It's like an upward spiral built uponitself. But I see so many marketing team, sells teams, leadership teamsstruggle. They get stuck in the doing of the work that it's very hardfor them to create that space and time to just think, just pause.What is something practical that you could recommend because, like I'm seeing this,you know, as one who works in digital, there's a lot of distractionsbuilt into digital, the dings, the buzzes, and it's almost like wecreate this false sense of I need to be on seven but even after beingin coach myself, those free days, just twenty four hours of just nothing, silence, in my mind that is. But but there I literally do digitaldetoxes on those days. It's super important. Yeah, when you weretalking US thinking about the quote, and I think it comes from the bookthe road less stupid. I could be wrong, but basically, you know, people sometimes are running enthusiastically in the wrong direction and it feels good tobe running enthusiastically, but you got to kind of ask yourself, are yougoing in the right direction? And I think if you're not taking the timeto stop reflect. You know, I'm kind of reminded of the idea ofairplanes. Honestly, like airplanes, you know from what from what I've heard, like they spend an enormous amount of flight time off course because of windpressure and like turbulence and stuff like. They're constantly being nudged off course.But they have an inertial guidance system so like every like literally every few seconds, I think, their course correcting, because if they weren't course correcting regularly, they wouldn't get to the destination on time, which they usually do.So, like the ideas is if you're off even a matter of one ortwo degrees for long enough period of time, you could be hundreds of miles offyour destination. And so, from my perspective, taking the time tothink and reflect into journal and to like...

...reassess your vision, reassess your direction, reassess your process, like reinss your priorities, like if you're not doingthat, then it's essentially like you're an airplane. You don't know how offcourse you actually are, and the longer you're off course, the longer theopportunity cost to getting back. You know, it reminds me of the quote fromCovey as far as like it doesn't matter how many steps you take upthe ladder if it's facing the wrong wall. So, you know, this bringsup the the dance olvin quote. All progress starts by telling the truth. But I think from a very practical standpoint, kind of like you havingregular days where you take the day off and you like really give yourself thespace to think. Creativity, like they say that sixteen percent of creative haveideas happen while you're at work. The rest will happen while you're recovering,resting, you know, in the shower, on vacation. But even more likejust taking ten fifteen minutes in the morning before you jump into your phoneto just journal about your future stuff, about your goals, about your team, if you do it in the right environment where you're like for me,I just do it in my car. There's no there's no distractions in mycar. I have my phone on air and my phone on airplane mode.I might be listening to like some soft piano music, but other than thatI just have me and my journal straight up and I just write about whatI'm trying to accomplish and who I'm trying to be, and this is literallyhow you can train your selective attention, you can train your brain to focuson the things that you're trying to accomplish and when you're in that environment,especially, I would say, first in the morning, your brain is farmore likely to come up with creative solutions. And if you do that on adaily basis, should be getting solutions and be able to take action onthose solutions. That will change your life in business. If you're not doingthat, then how many days of of missed creative solutions did you miss?Yeah, you know, hearing you talk through this, creating a space,creating that time to stop, pause, think right about what future you're wantingto create is something that someone can do by themselves, or is it helpfulto have, you know, we almost use the word accountability before having anaccountability partner to do this together with or have someone to fall back on,just to because it's so easy to get back stuck in that loop of justcontinuously doing running enthusiastically in the wrong direction, as you said. But how?But is it important to have someone at least just to check in?It's it's incredibly important. Yeah, I mean I there. I wrote ablog post actually, it was very well received, about even daily accountability.Like one of the things that like I've done for a long time is,like I'll have someone that I literally send to text messages to a day.Takes less than a minute. I'll send him the three things I'm trying toaccomplish today and then at the end of day I'll give him a score.One out of two, one out of three, two out of three orthree, a three. Literally that's it. And like beginning of the day I'llget a text fro him, I'll get a text for me. It'sjust a list of three bullets and a day and like that's I mean,obviously then maybe will do like a weekly phone call or a monthly like gettogether and having assie bowl and like talk about it. But yeah, Imean I think that that's just one wave. I mean, the more accountability youand bed into your life and environment in the form of someone you canopenly talk to about your struggles and also your goals and someone who can,like you can report to, that's key.

But also just in general, havingan environment that expects you to become the person you strive to be,because you're very aware of it, you're telling them about it and they expectyou to become that person. I mean, the more your environment reflects your futureself, the better. That right there. You just text someone thethree things that you're going to get accomplished that day and then you kind offollow up. Why three things? Because I think that's so practical and Ithink that those three things are key. But why just three things? BecauseI think I even think about my wife. She has this huge to do listof all these activities every day. I'm like no, just write downthree. But why three things? I mean, obviously we all do morethan three things a day, but I think, you know, this isfocused on important over urgent. I would have these three things be what youwould consider important, things that wouldn't be on your to do list anyways.Obviously you've got a hundred things on your to do list. These are threethings that could easily be lost in the maze of busyness and not seen formonths. A big part of this whole future self process is it's about focusingon the things that are important to you that will move your life forward.You don't need to have a future self if you're just going through your urgent, day to day, busy life, like you can just wake up,go to work and be the person you are today. The idea of creatinga future self and upgrading your life is about doing things that aren't in yourbusy schedule. They're about creating space so that you can do one to threethings that are clearly moving your life in the right direction, whether it's developinga skill, pitching yourself to like a new audience, or just whatever itis, like it could even be going to the gym, like. Youget to decide what those one to three things are, but I think Ithink three is just a good number. I mean it's just not too big. I think the idea is like what are just a few things that,if you accomplished, you'd consider the day of success, and these one ofthe three things. Should clearly refres flect where you're going, not what you'realready too busy doing. Try The list should be short. Yeah, andthat helps to create some momentum for the next day, which continues to fuelfuture progress and, as Dan Sullivan says, progress not perfection. Because I thinkyou know, for especially, this is coming from a type, apersonality, I have to be very you know what it's okay, like andgive yourself that grace. You know what, Tomorrow's the new day. I cantry again and it's not failure, but it's progress. Right. Yeah, and simplicity is what creates motivation. So like if you've got fifty thingson your to do list, that creates what we call decision fatigue. You'llstart to be stressed out by the lists and then you'll have to and solike one, two, three things. You know, I mean honestly,one may be better if you could prioritize. What's the one thing that absolutely musthappen? I would rather you get one thing done then have three thingson your list and have zero of them get done, you know. So, like if this is about prioritizing important over urgents, like what is themost important single step I could take to day to move this thing forward?What's the most courageous thing that could do? I think that these one of threethings. They need to involve some form of courage or they need tolike clearly be moving yourself in the right direction that you that your future selfreflects, and I think the shorter the...

...list, the more simple, andthe more simple, the higher the motivation and the higher the likelihood that you'lldo it. Very, very practical stuff. Today been thank you so much forthe time. Thank you for sharing your perspective. I'm so excited foryou. With the launch of the book. Personality isn't permanent. Where can peoplepick that up? And if someone wants to continue the conversation that westarted today, where can the just reach out connect with you say hi,yeah, thanks. Jim's. You can get the book anywhere, like it'sand when book stores reopen it'll definitely be in there. There's a book fromwith paying on Random House, so it's like it'll be in every book store. You can get on Amazon, kindle, orange and noble. If you goto Benjamin Hardycom, which is my website, you will find a videoof me explaining how, if you buy the book, you can get accessto three free online courses. The book personalitiesn't permanent. I don't know ifyou can see it, but basically it walks people through there's about a hundredand fifty journal prompts that walk you through reframing former memories. One of thekey things that honestly shapes personality is former TRAUMAS that haven't been resolved, basicallythings that have still like an emotional signature that you're carrying with you. Right. So there's ways to reframe the meaning of experiences and change how you viewthe past. There's also lots of prompts about designing your future self, redesignyour environment. So, like I have several courses that I give away forfree that take you to the book. They teach you how to journal.Howso have a course that teaches the blogging strategies that I've used that have gottenme over are literally a hundred million blog views. So there's a lot offree resources on my website that you can learn about at Benjamin Harrycom. Soif you're a market a financial brand, marketing leader of cells, leader onthe leadership team. Connect with Ben Sign up by the book personality. Orse. Yeah, I get the free course. Just do it because, you know, as we continue down this post covid nineteen world, I'm more excited, really like, and I think you use the Warren Buffett quote, twentyyears is good. It's going to be even better. This is just amoment in time and I'm really excited to see all the opportunities that we cancreate, particularly as financial brands, for the people in the communities that weserve for a stress about money. So yeah, there would be other bigmoments. Who knows in five years, three year, seven years? Imean this is a big one, but who knows what's gonna Happen in future? But we know that in the long term future everything's gonna be better.It's exactly right. Hey, been thank you so much for joining me onanother episode of banking on digital growth today, for sure. Until next time,be Welldo good and wash your hands. Thank you for listening to another episodeof banking on Digital Growth with James Robert Laigh. Like what you hear, tell a friend about the podcast and leave us a review. On applepodcast, Google podcasts or spotify and subscribe while you're there. To get evenmore practical, improven insights, visit www dot digital growthcom to grab a previewof James Roberts best selling book banking on digital growth, or order a copyright now for you and your team from Amazon. Inside you'll find a strategicmarketing and sales blueprint framed around twelve key areas of focus that empower you toconfidently generate ten times more loans and deposits.

Until next time, be well anddo good.

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